Max Talbot is NSFW

I love you guys so much.  I’m home alone, laughing like Tom Hanks in The Money Pit because you send me the best stuff.  Specifically Amanda (@amandalitty) and Deb (@DLF1021)  who tonight sent this:

Leave it to Max to make the dirtiest-sounding workout video of all time – while wearing head-to-toe sweats.

#1: This workout.  Making other sweatpants jealous worldwide.

#2: This disguise.  I was thinking, “That’s not Max.” Why the hood?  When I can see a picture of your esophagus on Google because that’s how you kiss drunk chicks in bars?  When the camera cuts behind the pillar, I figured Max and the stunt double switched places for the big reveal.

#3: This trainer.  “Push it!”  “Keep it tight!” “Niiiiiiiiiiiice” with the throaty growl.  If you let the kissing (see #2) happen, this is what you end up hearing from Max all night.

#4: This cameraman!  “Remember the thing from last week? You don’t want to talk about it.  Just one more time.  Please, please.”  If #2 leads to #3, then #3 leads to this and suddenly your amateur late-night debut is being live streamed to the Philadelphia Flyers player phone tree.

I swear.  Close your eyes and listen.  Maybe not at work though, because your boss will never believe this is the sound of fully-clothed activity.

As ever, Max leaves us all blushing.

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  1. Not blushing. Cringing. Unpopular opinion, but I always thought MT was gross. I am a fair-weather Pens fan at best, and as for Philly, it’s all about Gingeroux, so he doesn’t even get jersey points. Is this serious though? It cannot be serious.

    “That’s three fingers, I want one!”

    *shudder*

    • That being said, I have never laughed harder at a work out video. Seth-MacFarlane-as-Ryan-Lochte level belly laughs.

    • That is where you and I differ, Jess.

      I love me some Max Talbot. I spent this whole video (and time after) sobbing and asking, “Why won’t he come back to Pittsburgh?”

    • Kathy Reply

      Ok, if Gingeroux made a video like that I wouldn’t be able to handle it. It is bad enough that he is growing a beard until the lockout is over AND has tweeted other players to join him. You’re killing me, Claude, I swear! And I am loving every minute of it!!

  2. Casey Reply

    I took your advice Pants—I got this email at work, I figured I would wait until I got home… Home alone, hub’s still at work…. I’m glad I took your advice…. I don’t think the office on AGING would appreciate “niceeeeee! push it!!! tighttttt!” I appreciate it though 😉

  3. The first time I watched, I sat and said “no fucking way!” I, too, thought he had a stunt double.

    I just watched it again (yes, I’ve only watched twice…amazing self restraint) and this time I giggled my way through the whole thing. The creepy trainer and Max’s cameraman friend must both work in the amateur porn industry in their spare time. This whole thing wasn’t scripted or anything…otherwise Max might have gotten confused by what they expected him to do with three fingers.

    The rest of that aside, can we arrange to get Max and Brooks together for a work-out competition? One-legged squats vs one-fingered pushups. We could sell tickets for charity.

  4. Kristi Reply

    I just showed this video to my husband. He’s a marathoner, and insisted on proving that he could do the one-fingered push up. He failed. I am now permitted to lust over Max at all times.