I’m trying to think of an analogy for how I feel. I knew the lockout would cause the cancellation of some regular season games. I couldn’t stop it, I could only hope to contain it.
NHL cancels first two weeks of regular season games – USA Today
But now that it’s actually happened I am overwhelmed with the force of my own fury. I desperately want to:
But let’s be honest. I’m really this guy:
The regular season was supposed to open on my birthday. What more could a girl ask for, right? Now I’ll probably have to go to Old Country Buffet or some shit because I’m in my pajamas and can’t stop crying.
I am ditched at the altar, middle of the road, drunk Joan Cusack from In & Out distraught right now. Just replace the “heterosexual” with “hockey game” and the dress with a jersey. Everything else in this scene accurately expresses my emotions. (If you’ve never seen this movie, now you have plenty of time.)
“I’m more miserable than ever and I’m a mess and I’m starving.”
Watch the clip where Howard says he can’t marry her and she loses it. Also me.