All the Small Things

I was really going to do a post about this Winnipeg Jets’ cookbook… so close.  They Instagrammed something and being married to a chef, I was hooked!  Sadly the video is a yawn but those wings looked pretty delish.  It’s for charity and so, yeah.

Off to the interwebs to find something to care about.

toews

Jonathan Toews will miss the rest of the regular season with an upper body injury sustained after a crushing hit (cue debate – clean/dirty/undecided) from Brooks Orpik.  I like the idea of Toews and Kane sharing a couch, watching hockey and shouting at the TV like I do with… you guys.  On Twitter.  That’s six games out for JT19 and he’ll apparently be 100% (Lindsay’s favorite expression) for the playoffs.

toews2

You can read about how Mike Green proposed to his fiancee, if you’re into that kind of thing (I am).  It obviously involves a pair of shoes.

mike

Why don’t I have one of these?

John Tavares is part of the new CCM ad campaign, which presumably is to sell helmets and overly serious facial expressions.

jt ccm

Martin St. Louis scored his first goal as a New York Ranger… which pretty much sank Torts’ and his Canucks’ hopes of the post-season.  Forgive me if I don’t applaud.

st louis

In a related story, Ryan Callahan has 5G, 5A for the Lightning, who have clinched a playoff spot.  (Alexis and Lindsay clap.)

Montreal Canadiens v Tampa Bay Lightning

In total the East looks like this, and whoever wants to hold my hair while I throw up will be rewarded in her next life.

east

The Caps are circling the proverbial drain.  TWO POINTS COME ON YOU JERKS!  I apologize to the husbands and friends I’ve dragged to recent games with the promise of nachos.  It is impossible to eat such feelings of despair.

pooh

My only light of hope is the Rangers & Flyers could play each other in the first round and so many negative forces might combine to create a black hole that sucks both teams into another dimension where they never play the Penguins in Round 2.

disco

If the Bruins win the President’s Trophy… I’ll say nothing publicly or to Chuck.  We’re already to the point of the season where we barely speak.

Here’s the West, which shows you why the Jets are writing cookbooks.  I hope Dallas staves off Phoenix because I know you guys love Tyler Tuesday and because I want to be nice to Chuck about something.  It has nothing to do with shirtless Jamie Benn playing ping pong.  Nope, not at all.

west

I somehow missed it three weeks ago when #TeamEbs & Co where stuck in an elevator.  My first thought is that I’ve seen Speed a hundred times, I’m totally qualified to perform a rescue in this situation.  My second thought is based on the month season the Oilers have had, maybe they should’ve stayed in there.

ebs

Also this gem  - think about it for a second.

Gabe Landeskog engaged in a Twitter conversation about which Disney hero he better resembles: Kristoff or John Smith (or Cinderella).

gabe

Erik Karlsson has 70 points.  That’s twice he’s broken 70 – each of the last two full NHL seasons.  The only other defenseman to top 70 points in the last 6 years (also did it twice)?  Mike Green.

Mike Green also started with limited tattoos and look where we are  now.

erik

Source video. 100% Swedish.

Meanwhile Matt Niskanen has 42 points and still insists on dry-parting his hair down the middle.  Also, a turtle.  I will never stop thinking this is hilarious.

nisky

Today is another day for your team’s fortune to rise or fall.  Based on all the falling my teams have done lately, I’ll just bottle my frustrations like a perfectly normal hockey fan does with two weeks left in the regular season.

You know how it is.

cap

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Leave a Reply

  1. Thanks for the link to that Swedish Erik Karlsson thing. 43 minutes of serious bro-hang with Patrik Sjöberg. Karlsson is so very.

  2. Kaitlin Reply

    This Flyers fan is questioning whether or not she packed enough orange for this weekend. ::scrutinizes location of her seat in the Garden, commences humming “it’s the most wonderful time of the year…”

  3. Kate Reply

    I’m a ball of stress right now. And I sometimes think Dan Potash is my spirit animal: being tortured by hockey players but always coming back for more. Sometimes I hate everyone too, Dan. (Especially the Flyers.)

    Maybe Dan Potash and I both just need to watch Jamie Benn play some ping pong. So soothing. So aesthetically pleasing.

  4. I am 100% cool with this MSL situation now. Don’t need you, and look what’s happening now, 26 – plenty of points for Callahan while you’re up there for the Blue Shirts. UGH.

    As for Toews…cue the panic attacks. I know how Alison feels about Orpik and after that hit, I’m with her. I’m 100% for him to get a deal in Edmonton or Phoenix if JT ain’t healed up for April 16. Come playoffs, you don’t want to know me.