What's Up, Ya Sieve

The power of Foxy Friday is surprising.  Players have an eerie tendency to over-perform immediately after being featured – and it’s not always a good thing for us.  When NYI’s Matt Martin pretty much ruined my life in Game 2 vs. the Penguins, I promised not to foxify anyone from an opposing team for the rest of the playoffs.  These are dangerous times.

I wanted to feature a player who’s still playing hockey, since we have to get through the whole summer with guys playing golf.  How to do that without cursing myself tonight?  How about one of each?

Ottawa – Eric Gryba

Suspended two games in Round 1 for an earth-shattering hit that seemed clean to us, Eric Gryba is Chuck’s kinda guy.  With that beard, he could be Rick Nash’s stunt double.  He left Tuesday’s game with an ‘upper body injury’ after a big hit from Pens’ Brooks Orpik, and will not play tonight.  Get well, Eric! (Just not well enough to score goals, or stop them, you know… that’s my disclaimer.)

Pittsburgh – Matt Niskanen

If you never looked past James Neal in the Penguins/Stars trade, you may have ignored Nisky back there on the blue line.  Being adorable.  Having “Norman” for a middle name.  Talking like he’s from Minnesota with a shot of Texas.  Maybe you saw him fighting Kyle Okposo in Round 1.  Stupid brawl, but foxy black eye.  Go ahead and score all the points you want. (@alisonsykora approves this message.)

New York - Derick Brassard

Rhonda suggested Derick for Foxy Friday and got a really huge NO from me, but I’ll include him here.  Who does he look like to you?  It’s not Logan Lerman.  Someone on Glee?  I feel like Derick is going to break into a cover song at any moment.  I thought he was a rookie, but it turns out he was just playing in Columbus for 5 years.  Maybe I’ll just call him Foxy Trade Bonus.

Boston – Daniel Paille

Chuck hopes the Foxy Friday luck rubs off on Pie, since he hasn’t scored in a bit.  I think Paille looks much better without his heard.  It’s the whole strong-jawed, Bryce Harper thing.  But he can keep growing it as long as Chuck gets to keep watching her Bs – and he keeps hugging people this enthusiastically.

Los Angeles – Jarret Stoll

Jarret Stoll got hit by Raffi Torres in Game 1 of this series.  Torres got suspended (shocker) and Stoll missed Game 2 last night.  I don’t really get swoony over Stoll – are there any blond celebs he hasn’t dated? – but I like Erin Andrews a lot.  If he’s good enough for her, he’s good enough for Foxy Friday.  Here’s hoping he’s back in the Kings’ lineup soon.

San Jose – Joe Pavelski

Featured in this week’s BeardWatch2013 for his perfect 1:1 hair-to-beard ratio, Little Joe is one of my favorite Sharks.  Also the Sharks’ TV commercials were a highlight of living in the Bay Area for three years.  Enjoy Joe Pavelski – Lousy Detective, Joe Pavelski’s “Rest Homies” and just plain old Joe Pavelski.

Detroit – Jordin Tootoo

Things Jordin Tootoo loves: Instagram, his girlfriend, pictures of food and hockey fans.  He is quite possibly the most exuberant NHL player on social media (minus Biz and with zero snark).  Not only was Jordin the NHL’s first player of Inuit descent, but also the first from the Canadian province of Nunavut (Correction: Per shanes, it’s the territory of Nunavut. I have no idea what the distinction means, but I shall look it up!).  There’s a place in Canada where not everyone plays NHL hockey?  Dreams ruined.  Jordin is currently benched in favor of Todd Bertuzzi (DISLIKE) – maybe this will put him back in the lineup.

Chicago – Brian Bickell

A long-standing Foxy Friday requirement: Must Love Dogs.  Brian Bickell does.  He and his wife even founded Chicago Loves Pits, an organization to educate and open hearts and minds about pitbulls.  D’awww!  I know the sweetest pit, her name is Luna, and this one’s for her.  Brian also very gracefully handled the Blackhawks’ decision not to include his name on the Stanely Cup, and we love a polite guy.  In a Christmas sweater.

There you have it, even-stevens foxiness across the board.  Let’s see if it works.

Boston Bruins center David Krejci is a Clark Kent.

During the regular season, he is just this mild-mannered guy, playing good hockey.  He’s not particularly flashy.   In fact, some times you don’t even realize he is there.

Then playoffs come around.

And he becomes this.

In just four games this post season, Krejci has 10 points.

10 POINTS!

That’s an average of 2.5 points a game (!).  In 46 games in the regular season, he had 33 points (10 goals, 23 assists.)

He has scored 5 goals and 3 of those game on Wednesday, when DK46 lit up the Leafs and helped the Bruins take a 3-1 series lead.

No affects of kryptonite here, people.

His Superhero hockey powers no doubt make him worthy of this Foxy Friday honor, but there are plenty of other reasons why he is so deserving.

So who exactly is #46 in the Black and Gold?

• He is the love child of Mike Modano and Napoleon Dynamite.

• He rocks camo way better than those guys from Duck Dynasty. (Except maybe Jace.)

• He is the creamy vanilla middle of this black and gold Oreo.

• Proper hydration is very important to him.

• If this blog has taught you anything, it is that we appreciate a man that can rock the plaid.

• He loves Tyler Seguin.  So do we. So…Do…We.

Bruins can close out the series with the Leafs on home ice today and move onto the 2nd round.

I, for one, can’t wait.  I might even sing about it.

Our Foxy Friday selections have a habit of playing really well immediately after being crowned.  I hope that trick does not work today (or this series) for purely selfish reasons, but I would never let that stand in the way of a Friday.

Foxy Friday: Matt Martin

When considering this Foxy Friday, I had the following conversation with myself.  I’ll let you guess if it was out loud.

Me: “Ooh, he’s cute.”

Other Me: “That’s Matt Martin.”

Me: “You mean Matt Damon?”

Other me: “No, but close.”

Me: “Right, cause I’m pretty sure that’s the guy from Fun.”

Other Me: “No, but close again.”

Matt is a winger for the Islanders, and if you haven’t watched any NYI games this season then at least you’re watching the playoffs.  Right?  It’s not like the Islanders make it every year, so they need you to focus.

Happy early birthday, Matt!

Matt has been with the Isles since 2009 and, like many of his teammates, this is his first trip to the post-season.

He doesn’t score a lot of points (career high: 14 in 80 G), but his role lies elsewhere for the Isles.  He has 37 fights in parts of 4 regular NHL seasons.  According to HockeyFights.com, he scored 3 wins and 3 draws (1 loss) in bouts this year.  One of those wins was in April, where he knocked a guy out.

Obviously not his intention, you can see at the :51 mark that Matt immediately waved for a Devils trainer when he realized what happened.

Like someone immediately waved for a pair of scissors when they saw this hair:

Still makes an excellent pirate Halloween costume.

Matt holds the NHL record for hits in a single season, recording 374 in ’11-’12… after which the Islanders signed him to a 4-year contract.  He led the League in hits again this season with 234 in 48 games.

Matt’s off-ice work included the Defending the Blue Line program, a charity that brings local military personnel and their families to hockey games.

In 2012, Matt won the Islanders’ Bob Nystrom Trophy as the player who best displays “leadership, hustle and dedication.” [link]  Very foxy qualities.  The award is fan-selected, and Matt edged out former Foxy Friday John Tavares by just 20 votes.

Word has it that Matt is dating Boomber Esiason’s daughter Sydney.  I would not normally point this out…

Unless she turned down Tyler Seguin for all the world to see.

ONE lonely punctuation mark between them.  ONE.

And that is how you know Matt Martin is seriously foxy.

Follow Matt on Twitter: @mattymarts17

(Now back to your regularly schedule program: GO PENS!)

Well folks, it’s the final Friday of April, which means the final entry for the Foxy Friday Fan Challenge.

This week,  Brenda (@wishinonehand) wins again.  We swear it isn’t nepotism, but when you submit good stuff, we have to share it.

And this one is most defintely a keeper.

Sadly, we don’t get to watch much Red Wings hockey but next season we’re about to watch a WHOLE  lot more.

We definitively don’t mind seeing more of this guy.

Don’t mind at all.

[Chuck's note:  His beard.  Good lord the beard. I'm swooning here. Quick! Someone get a me a chaise that I can swoon dramatically on to.]

How Swede It Is

In case it hasn’t been said before… thank you, Sweden.  You are so generous with your vast foxy fortunes.  You have given us:

Peter Forsberg

 Why yes, that IS a Norse god.

Nick Lidstrom

 He may have retired from hockey, but he will never retire from hotness.

Markus Naslund

His foxiness even transcends a Canucks jersey. 

Andreas Lilja

This is the very definition of ruggedly handsome.

Henrik & Joel Lundqvist (Twinsies!)

Don’t know what’s going on here.
Don’t much care, either.

Gabriel Landeskog

The young & the foxy.

Now that is an embarrassment of riches, right there.

But you, Sweden, you did not stop there.

You dug deep into your foxy reserves and also bestowed upon us…

Henrik Zetterberg (and a pug)

All of a sudden I’m feeling very motivated to learn Swedish.   Do you think Rosetta Stone has rush shipping?

Wonder how you say “ridiculously hot”?  I’m going to go with “Henrik”.

The Cliff’s Notes on Henrik are as follows:

• Born October 9, 1980. (perfectly age appropriate)
• 6’1″ & 195
• Wasn’t drafted until the seventh round (210th overall)

Zetterberg also has a pretty impressive resume and collection of hardware – a Stanley Cup, a Selke Trophy, Conn Smythe, a Olympic Gold Medal, and a whole host of others.

He has complied the sort of resume that makes GMs drool.  And also Wayne Gretzky apparently.  Gretzkey said “I think Zetterberg is the best player in the game (at his age)… he’s just very special. I think he’s the best Swedish player they’ve ever put into the National Hockey League, and there has been a lot of great ones.”  High praise from the greatest hockey player of all time ever.

And that is what we call ‘salty’

If this oh-so-foxy-face looks familiar to you, maybe it’s because this guy has not one but two famous doppelgangers:

We love you, Jordan Catalano!

Even when he’s trying to look mean, he melts your heart.

Henrik did his best to end the lockout this summer – by wearing it on his chest.

 Henrik Zetterberg: sartorial zen master and hero.

 Zetterberg is so foxy that he even inspired a web series a la “The Office”.

Ladies and Gentleman – meet Fake Zetterberg.

Before we go, how about a little word association?  I’ll name an adjective, and then Henrik will demonstrate it.

Sensitive

Lustrous (specifically, hair)

Smoldering

Sophisticated

Charming

Blush-inducing

 Let us all give thanks and praise to the almighty country of Sweden.

Oh, can we get a hug?

Many thanks to all that submitted your entries for our 1st Foxy Friday Fan Challenge!

We know it isn’t easy to write these so we appreciate your time and effort to share who you find foxiest with us.

As always, hit us up on twitter (@WhatsUp_YaSieve) with any suggestions of who you’d like to see featured.  Remember to hashtag #FoxyFriday.

Love!

~ C & P

Week # 3 of the Foxy Friday Fan Challenge brings us to a place we never expected to be – except for that time I admitted this during the Cosmo’s 30 Hottest Hockey Players  debacle.  Damn the internet, it never forgets!

This week’s winner is Cheryl (@c_S_C_D) in Oregon.  We feel better knowing she struggled with it too.

__________________________________________________________________________

Let me preface this by saying: I am a die-hard Bruins fan.  But this guy has had my heart since I met him in 2004 (another story for another day), so I will just confess without further ado.  Ladies (and gentlemen)…

Foxy Friday: Carey Price.

We love part-time models.

Once upon a time, Carey was a baby goalie playing for the Tri-City Americans in the WHL .  He was little more than a dream of stardom and frosted tips crying out for a boy band.

Also, he was a heck of a goalie:

In his final WHL season, Price went 30-13-1, with a save percentage of .917.  Winning is foxy.  He also appeared in the World Junior Classic. Again, impressive stats.

Even more impressive company:

Shiny things.

More shiny things.

The Montreal Canadiens drafted him 5th in the 2005 draft, behind former Foxy Friday Bobby Ryan (#2) and Foxy Everyday Sidney Crosby (#1, natch).

Carey’s had his ups and downs on the ice.  The Habs reached the Eastern Conference finals in ’09-’10 (lost 4-1 to the Flyers).  Last season they did not make the playoffs.  Currently they are atop the Northeast by two points over the Bruins.  Whether they go in 2nd or 4th, this year Montreal is going to the dance.

Even when he doesn’t play, Carey’s been known to make a stellar save.

Look how nonchalant.  And don’t pretend the French isn’t making you swoon.

Sometimes he even practices as a forward, in case you’re into role-playing.

Don’t lie, it works for you.

Bruins fans, are you faltering yet?  How about if Carey knows where to find Tyler Seguin in a dark place full of heavy things to push?

WUYS has made it clear that to be Foxy Friday material, he must love dogs:

Some of us like cowboys and rodeo (including Pants):

Add in some hockey to get Chuck and the rest of the holdouts.

Carey’s going as Raylan Givens for Halloween.

But mostly, I think Carey is foxy because he’s a dork!

No hands on the wheel.

Approximate measurement of foxiness, in Metric system of course.

In conclusion, Carey Price is foxy because he’s Carey Price.

He takes things like this:

And makes them look like this:

One last pic, with the King of Foxy Goaltenders, Henrik Lundqvist.

Wanna know more? Like 22:45 minutes more?  It’s cool, you’ll be dead by the 8 minute mark.  If you hold out for the bowling segment, you can meet Carey’s fiancée (sorry girls!).

Check out Carey’s official website (www.careyprice.com), on the Twitter (@CP0031) and coming soon to a playoff game near you.

Week #2 of the Foxy Friday Fan Challenges come to us from one of the 1st WUYS fans, Jessica (@jfrancesw).

We know it was hard for her to admit her love of David Backes, but we’re pretty glad she did it.

GIVE US ALL THE PUPPEHS!

David Backes, Captain of the St. Louis Blues.

[...]

Remember that time in late January/early February 2012 we went a little crazy and named a bunch of New York Rangers at Foxy Fridays?

Yea, well this guy wasn’t one of them.  We’re idiots.  Thank goodness, WUYS fan Brenda (@wishinonehand) is on top of it.  She is this week’s Foxy Friday Fan Challenge winner!  Check out her ode to Dan Girardi and his face below.

Nothin’ but a G Thing

To all 30 NHL GMs who failed to draft Dan Girardi, who’s laughing now?

The New York Rangers signed Girardi as an undrafted free agent on July 1, 2006 and since then, all he’s done is play his damn heart out. From 2007 through 2012, Girardi played an astonishing 408 out of 410 regular season games (plus 42 playoff games, but who’s counting?).  Danny’s minutes are hard minutes: he regularly plays over 25 min/game, mostly against opponents’ top lines and during the PK.  He blocks shots like a boss and comes back the next shift like it never happened, causing some to wonder: Is Dan Girardi a Mutant?

by blog.nyrfulltilt.com

Super indeed.

Danny G made his first All Star team last season, which was very well-deserved.  He may only be 6’1″ and 203 pounds and had just 5G / 24A last season, but especially when Marc Staal was out with a concussion (and now with a horrible eye injury – get well soon, Staalsy!), Girardi is the absolute backbone of this team. Did I mention that he’s also an Alternate Captain when Staal is out?

Congratulations, Danny!  

But I’m getting distracted. You came here for foxiness. Where do I start?

Gorgeous big blue eyes that make the crystal clear Caribbean waters weep?

Check.

A cleft chin that Cary Grant (Ask your moms, whippersnappers!) would envy?

Check.

Lips that are absolutely perfectly… ahem, I don’t think I can even finish that sentence on a family-friendly blog, but… CHECK.

Oh, did I mention that he’s a doting father to the cutest son ever?  Commence ovarian meltdown in 3, 2, 1…

I mean, I don’t even want kids and I turn into a complete puddle over this.

On a team stacked with an embarrassment of foxy riches, Girardi is a standout.

Note from Pants & Chuck: asdfghjkl!

Seriously, can we please insist on full face cages? It would be irresponsible to destroy all this beauty.

Ssshhhh… Don’t talk. Don’t ruin the moment.

Do you need a glass of water?  We’ll wait.

Girardi’s hotness will stop for no woman. Don’t believe me?

What’s black & white and covered in grease paint? Girardi’s foxiness, of course.

Putting the “classic” in Winter Classic.

Put him in your Aunt Joan’s ugly holiday sweater with a pair of cheesy shades – he’s still hot like fire.  Bonus if you’ve got SKIN TIGHT RED JEANS!

Merry Christmas, indeed.

Does he even sweat during workouts?  If he’s not, I am.

Dan’s foxiness extends to his sense of humor and being OCD about neatness. All this hotness and he puts away his clothes, too?

How can you not swoon over a boy who loves Swedish Fish and Frosted Flakes?

I’ll wait while you watch that pelvic thrust a few hundred more times…

…

Dan Girardi, this week’s Foxy Friday.  #5 for the New York Rangers, but #1 in your heart.

Pants & Chuck Note: Halloween?  Get us a phone booth, a cape and DG.  Stat.

Your post didn’t get chosen? Didn’t get a chance to submit ?

Don’t worry! There are still three Fridays left, so keep those submissions coming.  Entries sent for this week are still eligible too, while Pants and Chuck, relax, take long lunches and watch Intern Jeff Skinner rearrange the office.

Last time we put Foxy Friday up for popular vote, Sam Gagner stuffed the ballot box from ten Twitter accounts.  Or maybe you guys get jealous that we’re all #TeamEbs when we could be sharing the love.

The Oilers beat the Blue Jackets 6-4 last night.  Sam had 1 G/2A and his 250th NHL point, so it’s his turn today.

Remember that time Sam had an 8 point game?

And a shootout goal like this?

Sam is 23.  That’s like old man on the mountain in Edmonton, if Edmonton had mountains.  He has 90 G/161 A in six seasons with the Oilers.

Before that, Sam grew up 5 minutes from John Tavares and played junior hockey with Patrick Kane.  Why didn’t we live near places like this?  Baby Sam!  What is your tie?  And your hair is so almost-Eberle… stop it right now.

While hockey stats are about running numbers up, Sam is also adept at keeping things under 140 and still making you fall in love with him.

Especially photos:

That’s why we don’t live in Edmonton, right Sam?

But we could be persuaded to visit, say in November.

If that doesn’t work, he sure loves to pour water on himself for a less subtle approach.

As of today, Edmonton is tied for 11th in the West.  My prediction for them the make the playoffs has been duly noted.  I wish they played before my bedtime but I’m doing my best to watch more Western Conference hockey this season.

Rumors abound that the Oilers may trade Sam before he becomes an RFA at the end of the year [link].  He’s playing well enough to earn a big contract, but they’ve tied up tons of money locking in Ebs and Hall, with Nuge and Yakupov coming due before long.

Jeeeez, look at the Oilers’ roster – that’s a lot of expiring deals [link].

Sam’s true home is in The Hobbit alongside Danny Briere.  It’s the ears!!  They can replace the disconcertingly attractive dwarf as even more disconcertingly attractive guys in the 5’10″ – 5’11″ range.  Also, Sam has Bieber on his iPod.  Cue me, singing the Canadian National Anthem and marching around my office.

And just because I can… photos from The Land That Time Forgot.  Seven year old Sam Gagner meeting Jarome Iginla:

There you have it, #TeamGagner shippers.  Happy Friday to you all.

As desperately as we might have tried, we cannot ignore Chris Higgins.

I mean, he’s a Canuck, for pete’s sake.  AND a Montreal Canadien. These alone make our skin crawl.  It fills us with the fire of a thousands suns.  It makes us rage like a Desperate Housewife who has drank up all her chardonnay and has no alimony money left to buy more.

But for today (and only today) do we put aside our blinding hatred and name Chris Higgins from the Vancouver Canucks this week’s Foxy Friday.

Chris Higgins is 100% Foxy.  Here’s how we break it down.

85% – Abs.  Those glorious, perfect, mantacular abs.

 We feel like Emma Stone in “Crazy, Stupid Love” when she sees Ryan Gosling with his shirt off.

8% – Beard.

7% – Smile and overall adorableness.

Obviously, he has some hockey skills too, but we wouldn’t know.

We’re too distracted.

This Foxy Friday is presented by democracy.

First I asked Twitter to nominate candidates.  Then I picked a guy who only got one vote and declared him the winner anyway, because he’s from my home state and he plays for my team.  Is it Nepotism? No.  It’s America.

Brandon Sutter had a good week.  He got some goals, some hugs, some wins.  He even got confused for his dad, which if you’re a Sutter is a big deal.

As you know, he is also not Jordan Staal.  The subject of much weeping into a bag of Fritos during the lockout has become instead one of joy for Penguins fans.

Pick us up, swing us around.

Sutts played the last four seasons with the Hurricanes – including three stints with my hometown AHL Albany River Rats.  Brandon, you’re already Foxy Friday, you can stop with the flattering me. (Don’t stop.)

He was traded to Pittsburgh during JStaal’s wedding like a cake with someone inside, waiting to jump out.

So far he has 8 G/5A in 23 games this year.  He’s playing primarily third line center, though with Malkin out everyone is everywhere for the Pens.  It doesn’t matter.  When Brandon ends up alongside Neal, all James has to do is flinch while Sutter buries it:

When he’s on the ice with Crosby, he might not even pass.  He might just win the game himself.

How’s that feel, eh?

What else? Brandon is 24 and was born in NY (though he is Canadian) on Valentine’s Day, no less.  He’s tall and honestly too skinny, I worry about him getting broken out there.

According to the Tumblr rumor mill, Brandon is also recently engaged. It’s no wonder when you read that he keeps his apartment neat [link] and, well…

This trade has been a win for the Penguins, who’ve been winning a lot of games lately.  Sutter looks pretty happy about it too.  Here he is answering Twitter questions from Pens fans:

The Pens play the Rangers tomorrow afternoon, the rematch against Chuck’s Bruins on Sunday.  Sutter’s 2-goal comeback game will not be forgotten by the Bs.  They host the Caps tomorrow.. wait, why am I not in Boston this weekend? How dare Chuck be away on a weekend like this?

I guess it’s better, we don’t want to fight. GO PENS!

Side note: 200 people (okay, 5) voted #TeamGagner because apparently we don’t do enough for the Oilers around here.  Duly noted, ladies, duly noted.  Sam will get his day.  A few other guys got multiple votes and I’ve filed them all away.