What's Up, Ya Sieve

On January 6, pretty much every team posted the standard NHL announcement on the end of the lockout.  Doubtless the human beings at the other end of those Twitter accounts were doing backflips and splits like the rest of us, but officially they had to toe the line.

Here’s what the players said.  These guys who missed the game more than we did, who cannot wait to get back to doing what we love to see them do.  Let this remind everyone why we supported them through the lockout, and be super-extra-glad it’s over.  This week, feelings are foxy.

Starting with James Neal, who knows exactly what to say to me.

I mean, play it.  It’s our song.

One word from Biz is never enough, of course.

“Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names.”― John F. Kennedy

“When you forgive, you love. And when you love, God’s light shines upon you.” ― Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild

“Three months ago, if you asked me, I would have told you that if you really loved someone, you’d let them go. But now I look at you, and I dreamed about Maggie, and I see that I’ve been wrong. If you really love someone, Allie, I think you have to take them back.”

“A broken friendship that is mended through forgiveness can be even stronger than it once was.”

“Jane, I never meant to wound you thus…Will you ever forgive me?” Reader, I forgave him at the moment and on the spot.” ― Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre

Dear 2013,

Please don’t let us down.

Love,

Pants, Chuck and everyone who feels like the kids in this photo

Crosby plays in Cole Harbor charity game [link]

Have a safe and happy holiday, everyone!

Since we couldn’t attend Canada on Saturday evening, welcome Alison (@alisonsykora) with a guest post!

I told myself I didn’t care anymore. The lockout was dragging and NHL hockey was no longer a part of my life. I had accepted it and moved on.

Then the RBC Charity Challenge happened.

“Mwhahahaha,” said Stamkos.

The NHLPA threw James Neal, Steven Stamkos, Logan Couture, Michael Del Zotto, Joffrey Lupul, PK Subban, and a bunch of other players on the same sheet of ice, and my inner fangirl was doomed from the very announcement.

I paid my $30, got a third row ticket and emotionally prepared myself.

I knew it was going to be a great night when I saw PK Subban on my way to the grocery store.  I did what any other normal person would do – speed-walked right past him in stunned silence then tweeted about it immediately.

Eventually it was game time. I could talk about how much I missed the sights, sounds and smells of a hockey arena, but I have far too many pictures of James Neal and Steven Stamkos for that.  I know what you really want.

First came the warm-up.  Team Subban debuted, then Team Stamkos.  That’s when we all died fangirl deaths.  Look, NHLPA. You can’t just put Stammer, Nealer, and MDZ on the same team and expect every female in the place to contain herself.  (Pants Note: Word.)

It was arguably the best part of the entire game, because the players skated without their helmets on and we got to see all of this:

During the game, the announcer gave James Neal the not-actually-real award of “Best Hair on the Ice.” Pascal Dupuis may not have been there to rub his stick in it (that sounds inappropriate!), but Nealer’s hair looked, as always, pretty fabulous.

Puck drop: Steven Stamkos, Elisha Cuthbert’s fiancé, and 4 other guys that you’re probably not going to know unless you’re a Leafs fan.  (Are there any of you out there, or am I alone in my misery?)

Fun fact: PK and Steven used to be teammates when they were little kids. Like that one stacked team in every rec league that wins all the trophies.

Jim Cuddy sang the national anthem. This picture is so Canadian it hurts.

 What follows is a random selection of the best pictures from throughout the game. If you’re not a fan of James Neal’s face, maybe just skip this part.

(Pants Note: Maybe just skip this blog!)

This just seemed like a necessary inclusion.

Nealer and Purcell having a serious discussion about which of them is better friends with Stamkos.  (Pants Note: Awkward foreground moment.)

Oh my god, just stop it.

If only they were facing the camera.

Obligatory James Neal tongue photo. Sorry about your ovaries, Pants.

Versteeg is probably singing “Glamorous” by Fergie to Stammer right here.

I’d totally be staring at/taking pictures of Teddy Purcell’s butt, too.

It took until the second period for me to remember that Team Subban existed.

I have nothing coherent to say. I just spent 5 minutes staring at Stammer here.

Bless your heart, Phil the Thrill. You put on a stickhandling clinic through traffic in the slot, then missed the shot, lost your footing, crashed into the boards and got up laughing.

My three boyfriends. But I guess I can share.

Pretty sure this line combined for like 30 points. 

These poor, misguided children. You are setting yourself up for a lifetime of heartache and despair. RUN BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE.

It’s impossible not to like Joffrey Lupul. He sasses Gary Bettman, has great taste in music, and has that face.

I was so distracted by Team Stamkos that I unfairly neglected Logan Couture until the 3^rd period.

Wojtek “the Polish Prince” Wolski, just for Chuck.

Last picture of James Neal, I SWEAR.

Sadly, the game eventually ended and I remembered that the lockout still exists. But at least I have all these pictures to get me through it.

On my way home I saw David Steckel who, despite what I’m about to say, seemed to be a lovely and fantastic person who I’m sure did not mean to hit Sidney Crosby in the head.

But while everyone else was asking him for autographs, I experienced an intense rage flashback. It took everything in me not to angrily shout something about staying away from Canada’s National Treasure. (Last week, against my better judgment, I re-watched “Pens/Caps: 24/7” and I’m. Still. Bitter.)

Hope you guys enjoyed my little recap, and more importantly, the pictures! If you’re looking for pictures of a specific player from the game, let me know. I literally took hundreds of pictures, so this is just a small sampling, and I don’t mind sharing.

Thanks to Pants and Chuck for letting me do this guest blog! Also a big thank you to Elena for fangirling with me throughout the entire thing!

Just in case tomorrow really is the end of the world, it’s been fun.  The lockout can’t ruin hockey for me.  I decide what I love about it, like the Penguins and Capitals at the same time.  Throw in a Flyer while you’re at it.  Expansion teams, underage boyfriends, never remembering if the Blackhawks are in my time zone… ah, the good old days.

From facebook.com/hockeymemepage

The last game I went to was a Caps playoff win and, as I said at the time [link], “officially the most fun I’ve ever had at a hockey game.”  The one before that, also playoffs, I dragged Gator out of bed at 7 AM on a Saturday like I knew something amazing was going to happen.  Then Mike Green scored the GWG.

If this is it, I ended on a high note.  Now I can look back at a few things I’ll take with me when we go.

Pants’ Favorite WUYS Moments (old and new)

The first picture I ever posted of Mike Green.  In the 2+ years since this post, our fandom relationship has had enough ups + downs to qualify as chick lit.

The Crosby Comeback (Part I).  Of all the things I could say about Sid – Where are you supposed to look when you look at him?  No place is safe! –  I love how excited I was for his return [link] and that it was a hundred times better in real life. [link]

The way these girls are looking at Jordan Eberle.  You can substitute another player (I wouldn’t) and some full-size chairs, but that’s us.

The James Neal shootout goal that named the Nealmobile.  It was the start of something.  I’m sure you can hear us in the screaming.

The blinding perfection of Steven Stamkos.  Also how high he can jump.  I don’t run away from just anyone in the street.

In Vegas, Intern Jeff Skinner won the Calder Trophy (even though I was rooting for Couture).  This is one of my all-time favorite posts.

The Toewsface. There are so many, each perfect in its own way.  Each one judging you.  Never mind the body it’s attached to.

Camp Biological Clock Biosteel.  And the start of this video where Nealer and Seguin check themselves out in the mirror.

Viktor Stalberg and Andrew Shaw show off their not-so-secret identities. Bless the girl who talks them out of their shirts in under two minutes, teach us your Jedi mind tricks [link].

My fondness for gingers hit a new high/low, depending on how you feel about Claude Giroux. [link]  You ought to be corrupted by now.

Speaking of: if you Google “hockey plaid suits,” we are 2 of the top 5 results.

Then I admitted that I love Danny Briere, right around the time he had to stand on a box to be interviewed. [link]

Gabe Landeskog discovered Instagram & Twitter, could not find a shirt. [link]

When Chuck’s team won it all, and I was really happy for her. [link]

Then my team won Pants vs. Chuck and I was really happy for myself. [link]  Now we actively hate each other’s teams, which makes this all more fun.

Finally I was convinced about Tyler Seguin [link], and Chuck managed to hold herself together. [link]

I didn’t do so badly myself, thanks. (Except for that Stamkos thing.) [link]

My one regret will be if I don’t see another Penguins game.  I’ve forgiven but not forgotten the end of last season, and I’d prefer to wash it from my mind with champagne poured from the Cup.  God, I was so angry at them [link]!  We all need a mulligan sometimes.

My feelings can be summed up by Nike Hockey’s new ad campaign.  What are you going to do, take away my Stamkos?  Sure they’re talking about the lockout, but they could be talking about the apocalypse.  Wherever we end up when this is over, I hope there’s hockey.  And Stammer.  Then cold is okay too.

Because #hockeyisours.

Mostly I hope you’ve had fun with us over the last 2 years.  I love this place and every hilarious, inappropriate, hockey-loving member of this little family.

And if the world doesn’t end tomorrow, you know what that means…

FOXY-POCALYPSE FRIDAY.

This is a few days old, but the best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.

It doesn’t hurt if you’ve got a smile like Flower’s, either.

Also doing good work for the holidays – the Blackhawks, helping the Greater Chicago Food Depository [link].

Jon’s getting way too much hand-in-pocket there, I think he needs smaller jeans (paging James Neal!).  Or more squats.

.gif by @jobiegirl6

Can we get that for Christmas, Tazer?

The best charity event so far?  Scott Hartnell beat James van Riemsdyk to raise money for Hurricane Sandy relief [link].  Hartnell raised $22k to JvR’s $18k… so JvR went shopping today at the Mall of America, in full hockey gear.

When there’s no hockey on, it’s hard to dislike the Flyers (and former Flyers).

The NHLPA Goals & Dreams Fund and RBC Play Hockey program have their charity game tonight in Toronto.  Alison will be there taking photos for us and trying not to get arrested.

If team Stamkos/Neal isn’t enough, Steven said in an interview this week: ”Hopefully we get back because I’m getting too big in the gym working with Gary [Roberts].’” [link]

And I was said:

by toewslake.tumblr.com

If you see a great hockey-related holiday story, send it to us!  Since I can’t just check team websites, there are surely a lot I’m missing.

Chuck has lost her mojo.  She’s using words like “uninspired” and “can’t muster the enthusiasm” to describe her current state of hockey-related ennui.

Well, it’s Ebs’s first-ever pro hat trick to the rescue!

In my our his ongoing effort to make the whole world #TeamEbs, Jordan scored 4 goals and 1 assist on Saturday night.  That’s date night, for those of you playing along at home.  We wish we had a date with a hockey game.

Sad Santa has reported that you cannot buy an Eberle Barons shirt, even though he is the AHL’s top scorer. [store link]

The embargo we’ve imposed on buying anything NHL-related hardly helps, because they don’t make Ebs shirts for women either.  GAH!  It’s okay, we’ll design our own and send Jordan a check.  He can buy a bell for his bike.

Entire post-game interview:

Despite all this, the Barons have dropped to 4th in their division and 7th in the AHL Western Conference.  The standings are pretty jammed up and they’re just six points out of the lead.  Plenty of time left to play… seriously, has hockey season ever seemed so long?

Okay, that’s gratuitous.  I’ll admit it.

UPDATE: Jamie says they do make Ebs shirts for girls.  When the NHL gets its shit together and buys us lots of flowers and chocolates, we might think about getting back together enough to give them money.  Maybe by then the Oilers store will have Ebs’ shirts back in stock.  Though it’ll be a tough choice between that and…

Please, hockey.  Please come back.

The number of NHL-player charity hockey games that I could not attend increased on Saturday night, with “Rock the Lockout” in Windsor, Ontario.

Coached by the Windsor Spitfire’s staff and captained by Steve Ott and Dan Clearly, a total of 28 goals were scored in the contest.  The event drew 4,500 fans, including WUYS pal Briehton (@beeDfraz).  She was nice enough to take some photos for us!

Thirty-six players participated, including Nealer.  I think he misses us too.

The game was less than 10 miles from Joe Louis Arena, and had a little Red Wings reunion going on.

One more, since Nealer goes out of his way to spend quality time on the other side of photos for us.

Here’s news video from ABC 7 in Detroit, including interviews with Dan Cleary and Niklas Kronwall.

The next charity game is the RBC Play Hockey Charity Challenge in Toronto on 12/19.  Team captains will be Stamkos and Subban, and the rosters will include Dion Phaneuf, Phil Kessel, Tomas Kaberle, Mike Komisarek, Logan Couture, Kris Versteeg, Niklas Kronwall and John Michael Liles.

And James Neal.

Thanks to Briehton for the photos!!

Today’s productivity will officially be… SQUAT.

Please tell me this CCM Pro Summit camp in Vail back in November was like regular summer camp, and they’re rehearsing an end-of-season Talent Show dance routine.  Kellerman’s, anyone?  I carry a mean watermelon.

Look at Duchene desperately trying to avert his eyes.  Look away, look away… or just get out of my spot, Matty.   I’ll take it from here.

Is it too many 80′s references if I point out that somebody’s going to put Molly Ringwald in a corner?  He’s leading with the wrong leg.  Tavares in the back looks like he could do this all day.  As for Gabe, well, half of him is more than all of most people.

(We love @alisonsykora!)

People are talking about Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers on 12.12.12, but we here at WUYS know how to party.

Happy Eric Staal Day!  

One of the worst things about this lockout is the delay of seeing Eric and Jordan on the same team.  This was going to be their year!  (Jordan got 11.11.11 and it fell on a Foxy Friday – he’s my favorite Staal, what can I say?)

It’s time to unmask the “sod farm” they supposedly grew up on for what it really is – an extremely successful Canadian genetic engineering facility.

In the event of zombie apocalypse, the “sod farm” might be overrun with resourceful woman volunteering to help repopulate the Earth.

Ever the over-achiever, Captain Eric has a head start with two adorable children already.  This is Parker, our future intern.

Well, maybe Eric has three kids.

If you’ve never attended a Canes game and seen EStaal in person, you are missing out on a MAJOR AWARD.  Plus Intern Jeff Skinner wants to know why you don’t visit him like you promised.

Celebrate 12.12.12 by watching these instead:

What, were you doing something else today?