Last night, my hockey/lumberjack boyfriend scored his 300th NHL goal.

Rick Nash was all…

And I was all…

Then Rick Nash scored his 301st career goal.

He was all…

And I was all…

Flyers did managed to score two goals – including one that one off of Jake Voracek’s face – but alas it was not enough.

As expected, Nashty got the Broadway Hat.  Just me or is that hat looking a little worse for wear?

Also, I LOVE the way he always just glances back at the camera as if to say “Hey Chuck.  I see you there.” His eyes stare into my soul.

In other game notes…

• John Tortorella is a winner.  Not only did he get his 400th NHL win but he also re-energized the Rangers’ offence with a little Cupid Shuffle.  Torts moved Derek Stepan in center with Nash and Ryan Gosling Carl Hagelin on the wings.  The result? Four of the five Rangers goals.
• Nash might have got the milestone goal but Stepan was by far the Rangers’ best player on the ice.  He was everywhere and all up in the game like Pooh up in the honey pot.
• Inigo better get it together.  And soon.  Judging from the in-game interview that Tortorella gave during the 2nd period, I get the distinct feeling that the Fonz is not particularly pleased with the way that Brian Boyle has been playing.  Then they cut to Boyle looking all sad panda on the bench. Could a healthy scratch be coming soon?
• Taylor Pyatt is still foxy.

• Wayne Simmons is one tough BAMF.  Not only did he take a puck to face earlier in the game that required stitches, but then in the 3rd, he got clipped AGAIN in the face by Brian Boyle’s errant stick.  Wayne Simmons was all….

At 16-13-3, the Rangers have 35 points, but are still languishing toward the bottom of the Eastern Conference (two points ahead of the ninth-place New York Islanders.)  Perhaps these new line combinations will reinvigorate the streaky Rangers’ offense. The Rangers will visit the Ottawa Senators on Thursday.

For the Flyers, the outlook looks bleak.  The loss, combined with the Tampa Bay Lightning’s 2-0 win against the Buffalo Sabres, dropped the Flyers (13-17-2) into 14th place in the East. With Briere out with a concussion and Bryzgalov’s inconsistency, the malaise that has plagued the Flyers all season does not look to be going away any time soon. The Flyers host the Islanders, Boston Bruins and Washington Capitals later this week.

Is it January 19th yet?

Soon.

Two words:

…if a Mack truck wore a NY Rangers sweater.

Here I was, just minding my own, thinking I was doing all well with the return of hockey.  I was just going to ease right back into it and get my bearings…then BAM…Rick Nash.

from blueshirtsunited.com

Damn you, Rick Nash.  Damn you and your LLBean-boyfriend good looks and luscious, glorious, perfect hockey flow.

My head is spinning.

I need to sit down.

Now, I’ve gone from 1 to a 1000 and need the season to start NOW!

from blueshirtsunited.com

I need my tumblr feed to be filled with photos of this lumberjack.  I need youtube to full of clips of his highlight reel goals.

from blueshirtsunited.com

I respect the Rangers and the team that they’ve assembled and there is no doubt that they will again contend for the Stanley Cup.  They came *thisclose* last year and the addition of Nash with all his skill and dominating potential could prove the final piece of the puzzle.

For any of you who regularly read this blog or follow our twitter know how I feel about this player.  So God help you all if he breaks out in a big way this season.

WUYS will be Rick Nash Central.

from blueshirtsunited.com

3,821 miles.

That is what separates me from Rick Nash.

While I am left here to wallow in my ever increasing depression over the state of the NHL, Rick is over in Switzerland just having a grand ole time.

He’s climbing the Alps and making snowmen with Joe Thornton.

He’s looking impossibly adorable in a ridiculous uniform.  What is that logo on his hockey pants?  Is that the castle from Super Mario Brothers?

Power up!

He’s scoring hat tricks. Like a boss.

He’s rocking some flow that makes me feel all those feels.

Come back, NHL. Come back, Rick Nash.

I miss you.

We all know that hockey players are foxy.  I mean, why else would we devote an entire blog day to them?

Also foxy – the same hockey players with puppies.

Seriously.

I double dog dare you to find anything foxier. (Don’t even try.  Because you won’t.)

This week’s Foxy Friday is dedicated to those furry and fabulous canine companions of our most popular Foxy Friday honorees…and a few that were just to adorable not to mention.

Teemu Dog

Landeskog Dog

Sharp Dog

Crosby Dog

Keith Dog

Campbell Dog

Letang Dog

Tazer Dog.
(Come on, Jonathan.  It’s an adorable puppy. Why so serious?) 

Eberle Dog.

Neal Dog.

Lundqvist Dog.
(also, can we talk about those hips? King Henrik’s, not the dog’s)

SEGGY PUPPY!!!!

And the mutha of all…

Nash Dog!

Here are few that we just had to include.

Warning: Squeeee factor on these is about eleventy billion.

Nuge Dogs.

Colby Cohen Dog.

Parros and a very big puppy.

You want fireworks?  The Minnesota Wild celebrated the 4th of July in true American fashion: endeavoring to increase their attractiveness by 100%.  Maybe they want to win some games too.  Their holiday shopping spree picked up Zach Parise and Ryan Suter in matching (how appropriate) 13-year, $98 million contracts.  Well done, America.

Twitter was at Defcon One all day Tuesday and Wednesday.  That thing is worse than a middle school cafeteria for a gossipy game of telephone – and I enjoyed every second of it.  Camp Parise nearly caused a meltdown when they announced they would have an announcement, took ages to get it together, then said Zach was still thinking about it.

It was exactly like DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince singing about a girl who takes so long to get ready for a date that they miss the whole show.

But good for Zach, taking his time deciding which team to spend the rest of his life with.  Parise and Suter’s former teams (NJ and NASH) were in the running to re-sign, as well as other major contenders like Pittsburgh and Detroit.  Comparable offers were made, but both players chose Minnesota from a wide field.  Suter is from Wisconsin and his wife is from Minnesota.  Parise is a Minneapolis hometown hero – they should have a parade for his arrival.  The Wild have a great fan base, with 98.4% home attendance this year [link], despite missing the playoffs in eight of 11 seasons.  How excited are those fans now?

Suter brings the Wild 46 points, a top-notch blue line anchor and his guitar.  You know this guy is fun on the bus!  He knows all the words to your favorite song.

Parise notched 69 points and a Stanley Cup-final run last season.  We hope he packed a whole closet-full of snuggly sweatshirts.

Minnesota ranked #20 in total salaries last season, with over $8 million in cap space.  Currently they have just over $2 million left for next season.  The off-season frenzy turns now to other top available players like Rick Nash and Bobby Ryan.  A team looking to bump up their foxiness could do worse.

Of course Nash & Ryan are not UFAs.  Teams will have to give up big time assets to get them.  Especially Nash – at mid-season, the asking price was sky high.  Now that Parise is off the market, Nash’s value is looking very strong against the dollar. His contract goes through 2018 at $7.5 million and climbing.  Bobby Ryan is younger, cheaper and shorter-term at $5.5 million through 2015.

Plus, he really loves his cat.

Note to Rick Nash: Come to Pittsburgh! We didn’t get Zach, but you’re not our second choice. Well, maybe Crosby’s.  Either way, he needs a winger like he needs bigger pockets and we’re sick of hearing about it.  You can run people over before they get their hands on the Kid.  Imagine the scenario: Sid + Rick vs. Geno + James for which line can score more goals?!  I flail.  What about the Crosby, Stills & Nash jokes to be ruined by whoever gets that other wing?

Either of these guys to the Pens results in screaming that you’ll hear from your houses or cars.  What about the Caps?  They need to replace Semin!  They have money!  Okay, I’m getting ahead of myself.  One of these guys to the Flyers and Pam & Deb will never let us hear the end of it!  I just can’t help it if I want this on one of my teams:

Yesterday’s NHL Trade Deadline was a snore.  I thought Twitter might melt from all the ennui and complaints, or Alyonka Larianov’s increasingly desperate attempts to hold our interest.  Here’s how things shook out [link].

John Scott was “shocked” to be traded to the Rangers, and was in the middle of doing laundry when the call came.  Bonus points for Foxy Fridays Matt Duchene and Gabriel Landeskog, who led the Avalanche love-fest for players both coming and going by Tweeting their teammates hello and goodbye simultaneously.  Brian Rolston goes back to Boston, where he played 4+ seasons.  The winners are anyone leaving the Islanders or Jets, and anyone going to the Canucks.  The abstainer was The Washington Capitals.  The loser?  Rick Nash.  Let’s discuss.

The Washington Capitals made zero trades, surprising a lot of people.  This seems to say that GMGM either 1) thinks the team is fine the way it is or 2) has given up on this season.  In my opinion, it’s more likely that no one was buying at his prices.  The Caps chemistry is flawed and inconsistent, but it doesn’t need to be burned to the ground.  GMGM showed continued/expensive faith in stars and fragile pandas (Sasha Fierce, Mike Green).

Misplaced faith?  Ask me in six weeks when the Caps don’t make the playoffs.  But what they had to sell (Knuble, Hamrlik) really only matches the Rolston/Mottau deal, and that was for prospects.  The Caps need players who can deliver immediately.  To get those guys, GMGM would have had to give up some of the few things that are actually working for the Caps.  I don’t want Laich, Chimera, Perreault or anyone else moving when they seem to be the only hopes left for March and April.

Then there’s poor Rick Nash.   Chuck and I are biased because we love his smiley lumberjack ways.  Also because he’s incredibly talented and seems like a genuinely nice guy.  But he’s no fool.  All Nash has to show for 9 seasons with the Blue Jackets is one trip to the playoffs, swept by the Red Wings.  The only place this captain is going is down with his ship – so he finally wanted off.

Columbus GM Scott Howson revealed yesterday that Nash asked to be traded [link].  This refuted talk the Jackets were shopping him of their own accord, and came as the clock ticked down on the biggest fish in the trade pond still trying to bite a hook.  But no team would put out enough bait.  Howson defended his astronomical asking price by pointing out he is neither required nor compelled to trade Nash just because he asked nicely.

How many of these are left in Columbus?

Now, I’m mad.  Howson threw Nash under the bus.  “Think you’re miserable now?  See how it feels when I turn the fans against you!” (Obviously not a real Howson quote.)  If Rick can’t get out of Columbus this summer, my heart will break.  He wanted to anchor that team and be the franchise guy that built a winning club.  Columbus has not delivered.  The Jackets are talking about “rebuilding” – rebuilding what?!  You have one Nash-shaped support beam and no house!  You never did.

In truth, the Jackets can’t afford to sell Nash unless they immediately start winning in return.  Rick’s price tag is something between a ransom and a bounty.  He’s all they have right now, after supposed big moves like Jeff Carter are quickly forgotten.  Columbus ranks 26th overall in NHL attendance, due in part to being so close to other teams (Pittsburgh fans call match-ups in Columbus “home games.”).  Nash is putting bodies in seats on nights when no one else can.  Without him….

I also feel for the Jackets’ fans; of course they don’t want to lose their one bright spot.  These fans, all the more precious for being in an expansion market, have stuck with the team like Nash has.  I hope they understand the position he’s in.  They can still get solid players in a Nash trade.  Come summer, teams struggling to make the playoffs now will have time to figure out what a fresh start with Nash is worth.  After what will be the Jackets’ 11th rough season in a row, it’s certainly worth a try.

Movember claims another victim.  Chuck’s not going to be happy with me.

But I didn’t make Rick Nash do this.  The camo jersey… since it’s a tribute to Veteran’s Day we’ll declare it okay for the day.  It’s the stache.   Ricky looks like he’s wondering just how much barbed wire he needs to keep you Pinko-Commie-Liberals out of that bunker he dug in the holler.

Maybe it’s better without the camo, right?  WRONG.  See how scared Tazer looks?  He’s signalling you with his eyes – “Help me.  Yes, you.”  Even though in this photo Rick looks more fit to sing ’50s rock about whitewall tires and rollerskating diner waitresses.

A reminder from very lucky WUYS friend Brittany (@blettany) of what Rick Nash usually looks like:

You are SO jealous.

We love Thanksgiving and fall and buying winter coats, but we’re now officially ready for November to be over.  Dear Santa, please bring us anything you want as long as it is clean-shaven or has a full beard.  We promise to be very good (until the All Star break).

Move over Kris Letang!

Rick’s got his own workout video AND his own home gym in which to do it.

Four words.

Rick. Nash. Workout. Video.

*dies*

Why I am I just finding this now??

He really is trying to keel me.

This man can wear a backwards baseball cap like a boss.

While I was busy watching a Hugh Jackman movie last night, the Ghost in the Machine was drawing my fantasy hockey team.  I want this higher power to pick my outfits – look at this beauty!

When I named my team for Mike Green, that automatically meant I wouldn’t get him.  Happened last year with Getzlaf.  Good thing I didn’t name my team HOT DADS or I wouldn’t have gotten EStaal, Squishy, Ryan(e) Clow(e) or Cam Ward.

Pants is a good coach, and she babysits.

I won my fantasy league last year, thanks to a team build around EStaal.  I also had Clowe, Cam and Giordano – we’re just getting the band back together.  We mayneed a second bus for all our trophies: the Hart, Rocket Richard, Lady Byng and Letang’s solid-gold hair dryer.

I’d also like to nominate my team for Best Looking.  Just throwing it out there.  It won’t win us games, but it sure looks good in the handshake line.  Bet you can’t wait till it’s Team Photo day in the program!

Yes, there's a trophy for this too.

So, who wants Brodeur?